Wednesday, December 9, 2009

An Excerpt From The Captain's Diary 2009


August 23, 6:30pm, The Oval, London: Sitting in a quiet dressing room, I put my head into my hands and the questions start. Why? How? Then I remember something that Andrew Hilditch said: "Look Punter, we've lost Warne, McGrath, Gillespie, Gilchrist, Hayden, Langer"...It makes me feel a bit better. It's not my fault. The boys tried their hardest, even Mitch with all his dramas. Poor guy. What a mean mum he's got. Yeah, we tried our best but we were such a young team. If only Brett Lee had of been fit. Might have been a different story then you Pommy bastards. Did I do all I could as captain? Yeah, I did my best. Made the right calls. What the fuck would people back home know? They weren't here in the trenches with my inexperienced squad and the selection panel. Fucking Aussie media and armchair experts. I can just imagine what those fuckers at WHAB are writing. The English media think I'm doing a great job. The Poms were just too good. They'll go down in history as a truly great side. I'll tell my boys how proud I am of them. Sure we lost the Ashes again, but we tried hard against a superior opponent, so we can hold our heads high. Like Andrew Hilditch whispered in my ear just now; "we've set the foundations to build for the future". He's right. The man knows what he's talking about. Knows cricket inside and out. Knows the right things to say. What are you looking at Sarfraz? Fucking extra baggage you were. Young Phil looks pretty dejected. Poor guy. He had to go though. Shane Watson is the future, already with a couple of nice 50's to his name. Plenty of big centuries around the corner. Some nice bowling too. The more I look around, it seems the harder my team tried. We'll take this pain - the pain of losing the Ashes, and we'll take the pain of losing the Ashes before as well, and use those losses as fuel for our Ashes 2013 tour. They say you have to lose an Ashes tour or two, or even three before you can appreciate winning one. We'll be back Poms. I'll be back...until then I'll imagine what it feels like to lift the urn and scream to the heavens: "Fuck you WHAB!"......

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